I never quite know how to navigate the world right now. The bombardment of news, and the intake of realizing the news shows a sorrowful, often hateful, world. While I know that the entire world isn’t one way, the world through my screen tells me it’s full of atrocious acts. Yes, they are there and[…]
Nothing as whole as the pieces of you
I’m molting the person I have been for the last decade or so, the one who taught her students to put their hands in their watercolor paint. To this one, the one who collects data and gets excited about research methodology to explain phenomenas in the Library Science field.
Though, this shift isn’t exactly a molting of old skin, it’s not the cohesive and cathartic relief of letting go of something that you’ve outgrown. Instead, it’s the painstaking and beautiful task of mending the pieces of being human – the head and the heart, so to speak.
I didn’t plan for this
I’m a planner. Not quite in the pinterest way, the color coded calendar way. My planning is rehearsing tragedies so I’ll be prepared. My planning is counting calories so I don’t change in size. My planning is saying I’ll be doing something by a certain age, and when that doesn’t happen I feel anger. So,[…]
Making amends with the pandemic
Botanical drawing by me, Rose Candela. Check my shop for other available original art! A few days ago my husband, son, and I were on a vacation, visiting a science museum. It was a joyous time. And, at the same time, I felt a tinge of grief. The grief (that day) was about all that[…]
What if death was part of the gift?
What if death was part of the gift? I received this exquisite bouquet of flowers, and today shared with Jason how I was having lil anxiety because, well, the flowers were falling away. But what if contemplating death was part of the gift? I know it’s unsexy to talk about how we’re going to die,[…]
But I miss the carrot cake, too
Recently, I was laid up in bed sick (not with covid) and was on tiktok for entertainment during those weird stretches of not wanting to read, watch a show, but…tiktok. I noticed this interesting trend. I’ll call it “I miss her”. What you see at first is an image of a mother and her baby,[…]
Have you heard the news?
I went after a dream of mine, one that has been seeded for about 15 years. I applied and was accepted into an accredited Master of Library Science program, and I’m over the moon thrilled. I had been intimidated by a few things about returning to graduate school for a while, but finally things just[…]
Studio structure made easy
One of the most frequently asked questions I receive is this: how do you make time to make art? While I wish it was a simple as having some sort of time management system, but truly the answer is this: I have all my supplies easily accessible and ready for when the time presents itself.[…]
On grieving the things you’ll never know
I recently finished the book The Last Story of Mina Lee, by Nancy Jooyoun Kim. This book got me with it’s story of immigrantion to the US (reminded me in so many ways of my own family), loss, the unknown, and most of all: finding yourself in the story that is never told. I often[…]
Claiming myself as an artist, part 2
Here’s the catch, as I tell my story. There is not a part 1 yet. Part 1 is a bit much for me to tell. I don’t have the reserves for it right now. It includes a traumatic experience at the age of 16, and then a few years later breakup with my cheating boyfriend[…]